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By Tony Poland, LegalMatters Staff • The Toronto Lawyers’ Association (TLA) says a pilot project introduced by the Family and Estates Committee to improve civility and professionalism is off to an auspicious start.
Family Lawyer Monthly Meet-Ups, promoted as “a fun and casual forum for lawyers to socialize and connect,” began in January to positive reviews, says committee co-chair Julie Stanchieri, whose firm Stanchieri Family Law hosted the February get-together.
The informal social gatherings are a way to return the profession to a more collegial footing, she says.
“In December, The TLA released the Report on Civility and Professionalism, which acknowledged what many of us were already feeling,” she tells LegalMattersCanada.ca. “There has been an unfortunate decline in the way those in our profession interact with each other.
‘It is something that we were all unhappy with’
“It is something that we were all unhappy with and wanted to take steps to correct,” Stanchieri adds. “Our committee is always thinking about issues that are important to family and estates lawyers. Creating stable and strong connections with opposing counsel is particularly important.”
Association president Aitan Lerner says he is encouraged by the early success of the initiative, which comes at a time “when we have been experiencing a precipitous decline in civil discourse within our profession.”
“When we embarked on our report, the intent was to make the issue a topic of discussion so more people would realize this is a problem that needed to be tackled,” he says. “The Family and Estates Committee has taken up the challenge and is changing the narrative.”
Stanchieri says it is well established that the pandemic resulted in a precipitous decline in social mores.
Lost face-to-face time
“Pre-COVID we did everything in person. We were in court all the time. We would bump into each other in the halls, conduct mediations in person and see each other frequently,” she says. “With COVID we lost that face-to-face time. The pandemic forced the world to go online and it is always easier to lack civility in emails or in any kind of written communication.”
Family and estates lawyers “deal with many difficult issues” that can make the job more stressful, which is why it is important to address the decline in civility and professionalism, Stanchieri explains.
“We represent people who are often on edge and tensions can run high,” she says. “The job we do can become even more stressful if opposing lawyers don’t have at least a good working relationship.”
Stanchieri says clients fare better in the final result if their lawyers can communicate respectfully.
‘Better able to come up with creative solutions’
“When we are civil, it can make it easier to settle most of our matters because we are better able to come up with creative solutions,” she says. “Or, in the worst case, if we are unable to come to a resolution through negotiation and need to go to court, we can still do that on a cooperative basis.”
“We are really problem solvers, seeking an answer for a particular family,” adds Stanchieri. “By being civil, it allows us to serve our clients and the public more effectively. In the end, that helps to reduce the emotional toll on the families we represent.”
Being polite and courteous also has its advantages for lawyers as well, she notes.
“We don’t want to always be stressed and angry with one another or having that added level of conflict on a file,” Stanchieri says. “It benefits our emotional well-being because we are focused on the legal issues, not the animosity. If you have a disagreement, it can be a principled one in the sense that everybody has their argument to make and can do it respectfully and courteously.”
She says the monthly informal gatherings are a simple but effective way to foster congeniality.
Happy to have an opportunity to socialize
“Family lawyer Stephen Benmore hosted the first one in January and it went phenomenally well,” Stanchieri says. “Everyone was so happy to have the opportunity to socialize and communicate with each other in a relaxed way.”
The plan is to have different lawyers or law firms host a monthly event, she says.
“They are intended to be very informal gatherings. Each firm will decide where it will be held and how long it will run,” says Stanchieri. “All we ask is that those interested sign up because there is usually going to be a limit on the number of people that can come to any one event and we need to plan for food and drinks for those in attendance.”
The next meetup will be held on March 28 at Bales Beall LLP from 5:30-8 p.m. Family lawyers (members and non-members of the TLA) can register here.
The committee will also be hosting a pub night on May 16 at CRAFT Beer Market, 1 Adelaide St. E.
She says because the meetings are informal, they also have the added benefit of allowing those new to the profession to mingle with experienced lawyers.
“In the past, if you were a young lawyer in this practice area, you used to get the benefit of going to court and watching senior counsel. You would also have the chance to speak with a senior member of the bar in the hallway,” says Stanchieri. “That doesn’t really exist anymore. So now young lawyers can come out and communicate with others in their area of practice.”
Mentoring plays an important role
Mentoring is an important part of what the Family and Estates Committee does, she says.
“We are always trying to give newer calls to the bar the opportunity to connect with mid-level to senior lawyers so that they can discuss anything important to them,” Stanchieri says. “The need for mentoring has always been there but I would argue it is now more necessary than ever.”
The committee launched a mentoring program last fall, putting out the call for volunteers, she says.
“I wasn’t surprised at all that there would be interest in something like this. Many lawyers are happy to give their time to newer calls because they had that guidance when they started out,” says Stanchieri. “They appreciated the help and they know how important it is.”
She says learning from someone who believes in courtesy and respect will help ensure the next generation of lawyers will carry on the tradition and that can only benefit the profession.
“Law is a way of life. You want to be happy in what you are doing. You want to get up every day and feel like you are contributing in a positive way,” Stanchieri says. “Being civil and respectful is something every profession should embrace. Law is no exception.”